My heart’s crippled by the vein that I keep on closing

good grief i need an alternative to MS Paint

good grief i need an alternative to MS Paint

I’ve realised the optimal way for girls to meet guys has got to be donating blood.  Why?

The guys:
– Are free of AIDS and Hepititis
– Are over 50 kg
– Are at least relatively straight*
– Are on display with their arms out in such a way that any wedding ring is easily discernable
– Are not in a position to get up and move away if you start talking to them
– Are either there because they want to hit on similarly minded  girls / because they have hit on a clever way to get time out of the office / or because they are Good Guys Who Care.

These are all good things!  Plus the blood donor people come to the top floor my office building, so they’re all presumably based conveniently nearby, and we could theoretically eat toffeepops and drink cocoa while we wait to recover, looking over the harbour.  Swooon.  Also, with all the blood drained out, I suppose I’m less likely to have  enough spare to blush, so less chance of cute-boy-enduced embarassment.

michael-pitt1

It’s also possible I have romanticised blood donoring due to one Henry Parker who, in season 3 of Dawson’s Creek, exchanged so much of his blood for money (they pay you over there!) to pay for a super date with Jen, that he spent the whole magic night being all pale and shakey and eventually fainted.

Double swoon.

  • personally I have issues with the whole no gays giving blood rule and everytime I read that clause in the pamphlet it’s like getting hit in the face with the 80s stick – but anyway, for the shallow, shallow purposes of this post I suppose it’s not the point.
Advertisements

January 13, 2009. Tags: , , . boys, tawdry teen tv.

Leave a Comment

Be the first to comment!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Trackback URI

%d bloggers like this: